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28th July was going to be one of the most memorable days of my life. It was my convocation and I was really happy to meet my parents after 3 long months. I could see their eyes beaming with joy. I was the first girl in my family to get a degree in Management. My job was to begin in a month in the city.
I came back to my native home town, Jabalpur for a few days. Back to the warmth of my bed and the food cooked by the world’s best cook- my mother. After about 3-4 days, my father raised the issue of my marriage! He told me that he had already screened the profiles of 3-4 prospective grooms and wanted me to have a look at them. It was then, My world turned upside down.
Here I was, having earned a prestigious degree, about to stand on my own two feet and on the other hand were my parents on a mission to find the most suited son-in-law.
My father said that, since now I was going to be working in Delhi, I might as well get married and live with ‘someone’. The fact that that “someone” had to be necessarily my husband was something I couldn’t comprehend.
I told him, ” I’m just 23 and I have a long road ahead”. But guess what? It was all about my age! I had completed my education and got a decent job. According to him, It was more than I could ask for. I wonder how different would be the scenario for my brother, who is on his way to attain his PHD in Microbiology.
But then, I was different from my brother in every possible way, I was a daughter. My father said that he had certain responsibilities. It was this moment that I truly felt more like a burden than a daughter. Getting me married at the right age to the right guy in the right family was of paramount importance. But who had placed this responsibility on him? Who decided the “right age” to get married? For sure as hell, I didn’t.
How cliche is this attitude of Indian families? It truly chokes me to hear this .
There were intense conversations and arguments following my father’s sudden revelation about getting me married. Over the course of a couple of weeks, my father’s response to my views were negative. Not a shocker, he has the typical Indian narrow mindedness. He felt that all this was a result of me being a little too educated than required. But, he doesn’t realise that there is nothing called being over educated.
But, How could I dare to reason with him? I told my dad once and for all, I would get married when I find the right guy and when I feel I’m ready. If he couldn’t agree with me, he might as well disown me. Yes, I said that outright.
It’s true that it was my education that has made me feel confident about myself and given a boost to my drive to achieve. The truth is that education is a weapon and it truly gives you courage. But I guess my dad couldn’t understand the “courage” part. For that is the sole prerogative of men. Talk about me doing something “manly”!
Long story short, after 7 months of continuous hustle with my family and rejecting the meaningless proposals , I finally found my happy space. My fight to achieve had a result after all, and today I am a proud branch manager at Axis Bank. I crave ambition and I don’t deny that. I think that’s the most beautiful feeling and I want to experience it time and again. I didn’t give up and you shouldn’t too. There’s absolutely no reason why you should sacrifice your education to be in the good books of the society.
I AM JUST ANOTHER WOMAN WHO DARED TO STAND UP FOR HER AMBITION, FOR SOMETHING SHE BELIEVED IN.
I AM SOMEONE WHO DARED TO GIVE UP ON THE DEMANDS OF THE SOCIETY.
I CRAVE AMBITION AND I AM JUST ANOTHER WOMAN.
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