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As we settle into a relationship and even more so after we have kids, we forget to give the required attention to one of the most important people in our life – our partners. The one person who made this ‘relationship’ happen in the first place and the one who has vowed to spend the rest of their lives with us, gets neglected and loses priority over all our other commitments – work, the kitchen chores, shopping, relative’s birthdays and anniversaries, children’s homework, even the daily soap gets more importance. The result – people grow apart, harbour resentment and become discontent with each other and the relationship.
All these things and the after effects of these feelings can be overcome with some smart planning and by scheduling a sacred time that is marked to be spent only with your partner – regular dates or weekend getaways – anything that works for just the two of you.
Here are six reasons that will encourage you to go on regular dates and outings with your partner.
It helps keep the third person away – It is no secret that one of the major reasons for an extra-marital affair is either lack of sexual intimacy and/or feelings of boredom and resentment in the current relationship. If you feel satisfied with the relationship that you are in, you do not try to seek out another relationship, this in itself is reason enough for you to keep working on your relationship.
It makes your partner feel wanted – When you take the initiative to plan and spend some alone time with your partner it makes them feel important and wanted. Both these feelings are required to sustain and nurture a relationship in the long run. So, make it a habit to plan and invite the other out on a date or outing. Just like you did during your courtship period.
It helps you connect – Ever tried having a conversation with kids running around the house or with the TV blaring? Not fun, is it? Now try having this conversation in a setting that’s far more quieter than your living room or when you’re not trying to either set the table for dinner or put the kids to bed. The difference is huge. You get to talk to your partner without interruption and on any topic that the two of you may find interesting and fascinating.
Taking out time to connect is specially important for couples who due to reasons of work or family spend a lot of time apart or in different cities. When couples spend too much time away from each other they tend to miss out on the changes in their partner and when they do come together – they feel as if they are with a stranger – at times – one they may not even wish to know. Regular healthy conversations are the only remedy to this problem.
It helps keep them on your mind and in your heart – The quote – out of sight, out of mind is not entirely untrue. When you spend too much time apart you tend to lose sight of your relationship and ultimately your partner. Regular time spent together, ensures that you and your partner are always on each others minds and in each others hearts. It also ensures that the two of you are in sync with what is going on in each others lives.
It helps you stay young and healthy – Love helps add life to your years and years to your life. A relationship where you feel loved and cherished helps you stay young and and healthy. It also helps avoid a great deal of stress that is caused by being in a relationship where you feel unwanted and unloved. When there is no stress or at least less stress, there are less health problems.
It makes others envious – Icing on the cake! Make all your friends and family jealous and let them wonder how the two of you after years of being together have managed to keep the romance in your relationship alive.
Hopefully these reasons will be enough encouragement for you to start planning some alone time with your partner and give your relationship the time and attention it deserves. I’ll close with this beautiful quote from The Notebook that best sums up relationships.
“So it’s not gonna be easy. It’s going to be really hard; we’re gonna have to work at this everyday, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, everyday. You and me… everyday.”
― Nicholas Sparks, The Notebook